Thursday, June 7, 2012

Setting the Women's Movement Back a Few Decades.....

My wonderful hubby always sends me to the car appointments in Akron.  The car place has these deep, soft, wonderful couches that you can sink into and read a book.  There is a vending machine with Coke AND Pepsi so that you can actually choose the one you like best (HANDS DOWN it is Coke, people, HANDS DOWN).  It's quiet.  It's air-conditioned.  It's a little slice of heaven.

There is only one downfall................

They ask me all kinds of questions when I take my car there.  It can get confusing.

Joe tries to prep me but, inevitably, they deviate from my script.........EVERY TIME.  It makes me feel like a total moron, not enough of a moron to actually do anything about it since it doesn't happen all that often.  But still.

So today Joe prepped me beforehand.  He gave me a coupon (actually he put the coupon in my car a week ago so that I would have it for this appointment) and told me to ask them what the better deal is.  Ok, got it - coupon, what's the better deal.  Then he told me that they were suppose to work on the alignment, do an oil change, look at the camera (at which point I had to stop myself from saying - the camera?  They do that?  I thought it was working fine, I just took some pictures the other day.  Turns out he was talking about the camera that does it's thing when we back up) and the CD player wasn't working.   Ok - alignment, oil change, camera, CD player - got it.

I get there and I am so looking forward to sinking into that couch and working on some stuff for church.  I can almost taste the Coke................

First question:  How many miles are on your car?

Seriously?  That was not part of my script.  I got the first question wrong already.  I tell the lady...

I have no idea.

She said that was ok.  Phew......ok let's get to the stuff I know.

Second question:  What are you having done today?

Alignment, oil change, cd player and camera, I smile proudly.  I start to walk away because I have given her my keys and recited the words I was told.  Not so fast..........

Third question:  What is wrong with the camera?

I have no idea.  My husband just told me there was something wrong with it.

Fourth question:  Does it work at all?

Yes, it does.  I think.  I mean, I never noticed it NOT working.  I am pretty sure that it works sometimes.  My husband just told me to have you check it.

Fifth question:  Does it go black when it's not working?  Or does it not turn on?

I have no idea.  Ummm, my husband handles everything to do with the car.  I think he just wants you to check it because he said there was something wrong with it.  (The lady actually laughs at this point)


Sixth question:  I see here that you haven't had the blah, blah, blah cleaned recently and that often helps with the blah, blah, blah.  Without it being blah, blah. blah then you might have some problems with blah, blah, blah.  Would you like that done today?

Blank stare.  Thinking.........should I call Joe?  Should I say yes?  Should I say no?  I didn't really understand 50% of what she just said.  Blank stare.

Ummm.....how much would that cost?

Only 109 dollars.

Ummmm, no.  Thinking I can ask Joe about this at home.  No need to further embarrass myself by actually calling my husband in front of this lady that just laughed at me.

At this point there was a lot of shuffling of papers and explaining what was on said papers.  I had to sign some things and there was more talking.  I wanted to tell her that this was all totally unnecessary.  I am more a point and sign person - no explanation necessary.  I assumed that Joe had taken care of everything when he called, I recited my lines and I was ready to get my Coke and get to work.  She obviously was at work and had some work to do, too.  I didn't want to get in the way of that work.  I almost laughed as she was very seriously pointing out all this stuff they were going to do for an inspection, some kind of blah, blah points inspection.  Then more talk of the coupon and what was the deal.  And, finally, done.

I sunk into the couch, got my work done, sipped on a deliciously cold Coke and had a mighty fine time.  I ended up explaining to the lady that that was why I was there - to enjoy myself, in peace and quiet.

She got the idea........that I have no idea.  


For another post on ways to be completely reliant on your husband............read here.   Please don't judge.  Once, I sent my husband to the grocery store.........WITH A LIST.  He called me TWICE.....in the middle of a grad school class, one time because he wanted to know if the grapes were a good price and the other time because he couldn't find something on the list.  When I got home he told me that I needed to make the list in the order that it is found in the store and that he NEVER, EVER wanted to do that again.  Apparently, it was pretty traumatizing.

We all have our things, people.  Banks, bills and cars are NOT my things.

Cooking and food stuff?  That I can do.








No comments: