Almost eight years ago, before I was wise to the ways of marriage, I had my deliciously warm and comfy down comforter on my bed. I loved this comforter. I loved to wrap myself in it on cold winter nights and read books long into the night. I loved on summer nights to turn on the fan full blast and still enjoy it's warmth. I love to be warm and cozy.
Then I got married.
Joe moved in.
All of a sudden, the warmth was not cozy but LIKE A HOT FURNACE I WAS TRAPPED IN. LIKE BEING STUCK IN A SAUNA FULLY CLOTHED FOR HOURS ON END. LIKE TRYING TO SLEEP IN THE SAHARA IN THE FULL GLARE OF THE SUN, WRAPPED IN A FLEECE SLEEPING BAG.
It was hot. Seriously, hot. I would sweat and I hate to sweat. It is one of 96 reasons why I don't run.
The comforter had to go. It was a sad day but I was still married to a wonderful guy so I dealt. But it was just the beginning of the GREAT TEMPERATURE WARS.
I am going to venture and say that this is a common problem among married couples. I think it is often ignored in any counseling sessions, marriage advice or any other resource that tries to prepare you for marriage.
There is one who likes it hot and one who likes it cold.
Which one are you?
I like it cold.
Joe likes it hot.
The man is his own heating source, let me tell you. If you are married to one of these people then you know. In the winter it is glorious...........you are laying in bed, freezing your little tootsies off and then in comes your sweetie. One minute later and you are warm and toastie and most likely not wearing half of the articles of clothing you came into bed with. It may be 66 degrees in the house but under the covers with the heating source it's reaching into the high 80s.
In the summer?
Not so much.
I have not slept so well the past few nights.
In the beginning The Fight was simple - AC vs NEVER AM I GOING TO TURN THAT THING ON BECAUSE I JUST SPENT ALL WINTER FREEZING AND NOW I AM GOING TO BASK IN THE PURE HEAT OF THE SEASON. It was also somewhat endless. Joe cannot fathom WHY you would turn on the AC to then cover up while you sleep. I cannot sleep without being covered up. Plus there is a difference between warm and cozy and SWEATING TIME BOMB, WAITING TO TURN ON THE WRATH OF ONE WHO IS HOT AND HAS NOT SLEPT ALL NIGHT. I know, it sounds dramatic but that is how I felt........in the beginning.
We have have reached a stage of compromise at this point in the game with minor complaining or "wondering" on both parts. I wonder why anyone wants to live in a house that can reach 90 degrees (I KID YOU NOT. It was once 90 DEGREES IN THE HOUSE. I waited til it hit that number, took a picture of it and then turned on the AC) He wonders why you need the fan on full blast and then cover up with a blanket. I wonder how sweat running down everyone's back is an ok thing. He wonders why anyone can freeze all winter and then want to be cold all summer. (Part of this can be explained by going into my parent's house on a hot, sunny day and descending into their arctic basement where temperatures drop at a most rapid pace.........seriously, you need 3 blankets to keep warm in the summer there) So on and so on.
But it's better and we are learning. I really only need it to be cool when I go to sleep, so the fan goes on full blast when I am falling asleep. I don't even think about AC until it gets to be mid 80s in the house. He acknowledges that AC is not evil. I acknowledge that our budget is tight and we need to be careful about the bills, my staying home is a non-negotiable.
We have come a long way......................still have a bit to go but at least we know one another better. Understanding might be far off but knowing and accepting is more than half the battle.
Any temperature wars at your house?
Do you like it hot or cold?