A Vessel

Oh preacher man, you have a gift.

The gift you have is to be in a room filled with people, in a church, on a Sunday morning and have it feel as if God is speaking to each individual, personally, one on one and He is saying different things to each of us.

I felt today as if God and I were in a room and He was fully loving me AND fully knowing me.

It's so terrifying to really feel as if God sees ALL of you -

you know, the parts you aren't letting see the light of the day,

the parts of you that you glorify but are really disguises for what is keeping you from Him,

the parts of you that SCARE THE CRAP OUT OF YOU because you might get it wrong and people might see you and I REALLY, REALLY DON'T WANT TO DO THIS,

the parts of you that you know what you need to do but don't really want to do,

that parts of you that are going through the fire - being refined and shaped and burned off,

the parts of you that secretly dream and see BIG things,

the parts of you that are becoming,

the parts of you that are GOOD but it's hard to bring to the light your giftings because it's weird but you  are being called to share them with the body,

the parts screaming for FORGIVENESS,

the parts of you that are hidden in shame but you know there is no SHAME in God,

Oh my.

I felt pinned to my pew, tears streaming, God speaking to my heart, whispering words again.

And as it is in the presence of God - there is fear and awe and the heaviness of His love and His protection, there is the lightness of feeling His strength and resting in it and there is excitement at hearing His words speaking into your life.

I wish that I were sitting with each of you right now.

That I could sit side by side with you, that I could listen to your story, listen to your pain, listen to your yearnings.

Because we all have them.

And this morning I learned and saw and was reminded.

I am simply a vessel.

That if I can work through my crap and if I can quiet my doubts and if I can discard my shame and if I do away with my pride then He can do His work through me.

Because it's really, really not about me.

I was reminded of this in so many ways this morning.

One way?

I know that preacher man.

We love that preacher man.

We have sat down at dinner with him, we have played with his kids, we know his strengths, we know his weaknesses, we have seen in him moments of frustration, moments of joy, moments of sadness and we are friends with him.  He is more than just our preacher man.

But when he speaks?

I do not see that man.

I see a vessel for God.

And He is speaking.................

It is LOUD.

It is CLEAR.

It is meant to move us.

Where are you being moved?

What do you need to empty yourself of?

Where are you being called?

What is God saying to YOU?

YOU are a vessel of His.

What an exciting time this is.............................

Love that we are in the journey together, preacher man and the wife of yours I love.