Friday, March 15, 2013

I Want It All

I heard words like those tonight.......something along those lines........I want to do it all.

That's how I feel.

I want to do it all.

I want it now.  I want it to be good.  No, I want it to be GREAT.

I want so much.

I get a little bit of time and space and freedom to move and breathe and my mind races.

It races with possibility, it races with ideas, it races with so much..........

And I want so much.

But I'm not sure that what I want is what God wants.

Ouch.

((((SIGH))))

I've been doing a bit of running and seeking and doing and moving the past few weeks.

All good stuff.  Some of it even GREAT :)

But I lost a bit of who I was, who God made me to be in the midst of the good stuff and it was a little hard.  I was tired.  I was overrun with details and timelines and lists and such.

Ugh.  I don't function well with such things.  I get overly involved in the details and they consume me.

I am like my boy - I love ideas.  I like to play with them, discuss them, dream them into reality, write about them.

And finally after the weeks and a few tears and a little downtime, I sat.  I read a book - a novel, all in two days time and it felt GLORIOUS.  I wrote.  I slept.  I baked.  I cooked.  I played with my kids.  I hibernated.

And one day I sat down and closed my eyes and saw two people tugging at a rope - each person was ME.  I was at each end, using all my energy to pull the rope THIS way and THAT way.  But in that space of quiet and stillness I saw the two figures stop their struggle and come together, forming a circle.  No longer struggling but working in conjunction.

That circle?

Oh, those dang circles, village folk....................

That circle?

It was a reminder.

That circle was my all.

I was getting outside of it as I was running and doing and moving these past few weeks.

God has it ALL.

I do not.

Focus on my mission.

Focus on what He gave me, use my gifts for my part of the Kingdom.

What's my part, you ask?  What's my struggle been?

Ahhhhh...........well, that's for another day, my friends.

For now, I ask you................what's YOUR part?

Where are you at the end of your rope, what is your struggle between?

Bring those ends together.................let your gifts and your mission be joined together - so that in your circle you may find your purpose, your part in the Kingdom.

You are part of it..........part of this body, His Kingdom........there is something that you bring, uniquely, that no one else does.............DON'T TRY TO DO IT ALL..........just do your part.

Isn't this exciting?  This fitting of parts, the seeking of the Kingdom, the reaching out to others, this finding who YOU are?

I hope you feel it, too.

You are part of the ALL.

Just discover your part.

Love you all.









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