Friday, November 7, 2014


I was sitting next to a friend the other day........talking, chatting, asking what's new.  They told me of an opportunity on the horizon for an acquaintance and while my words were positive, my face most likely was not.

Because while my words were somewhat positive, my thoughts were..........well, snarky.

Snarky in that I didn't quite see what my friend did.  I didn't see possibility and what could be, I saw the here and now and the "funny" bits, the over the top bits, the.....yeah, totally don't see it bits.

But not my friend.

They were kind and laughed and said yeah, I get it.  I know there's room for doubt.  But I love this guy.  He's got what it takes.

So rather than meeting snark with snark or rebuke or disappointment there was once again that love my friend has for so many.

I think how easy it is to get off snark has been elevated to a high form of humor.  How it's used to group people together but exclude others.  How it blinds us to see what's possible, what's real and shines the light on minor details, small words or phrases, people's faults rather than their very best qualities.

And I get it.

To be brutally honest?

It's fun.

It's fun to point out flaws and joke about them and say it's harmless and just in good fun.

It feels good to be part of one group over the other, to build up self and cast down the rest.

It's EASY............some faults are GLARING and it is SO HARD not to laugh.  I mean, it's almost as if they are ASKING FOR IT, right?

There are whole v shows and websites and blogs devoted to such things.......where the only purpose of such sites and shows are to make fun of other people, to point out flaws.

It's disheartening...........yet I am easily sucked in.

I want to not be sucked in.

I want to not participate in the snark.  I want to read, listen or watch and instead of going for the jugular I want to go to the heart of what people are presenting, what they are offering to the world.

I see my babies walk out this door and into their school each morning and I pray for the snark to end. I pray that the world will look upon them with eyes of kindness rather than eyes of criticism, gleefully waiting for a misstep.  I pray that they are exposed to people who see possibility and not all they AREN'T right now.  I pray that all their words and actions and clothes aren't picked apart but praised for what they are.  I pray that people go not for the jugular but for the heart - for my kids, well, they have heart.

And rather than picked and poked at and left as scrap?  I want their hearts made whole.  I want them to come alive to the possibilities that God has for them.  I want them to know all the AMAZING, WONDERFUL things that can come from being heard and seen and known.  I want them to value the voice that they have.  I want them to take on life confidently.

But it starts with me.

The adult.

What they see, they mimic.

What they hear, they repeat.

What they live with, they live out.

What is done to them, they will do to others.


Time to end the snark.

Time to look with eyes of possibility.

Time to bypass the jugular and go to the heart of who people are.

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