Sunday, October 2, 2011

God Wears Hot Pink Lipstick

This past month has been filled with so much sucky life stuff. I find that any poetry, any beauty that may occasionally come forth from these pages is lost, lost in the suckiness of life lately. I want to find a way to make divorce and death and loss and separation sound lyrical and profound but I just can't find it in me tonight.

Yet I have found in the suckiness of life something to hold onto. I have found that angels and God and hope are not only heavenly things but solid, real things to hold onto. God is not always a mystery. God is not invisible. God is here. He is here today, right now.......He is guiding us through the suckiness of life through the hands, arms and hearts of His children.

God is in the delivery room in the form of very real people holding up a father watching his wife suffer and needing the strength to stand. God gives him the strength through the arms of Liv, the hands of Molly, the prayers of Logan.


God is in the text that answers back at 11:00 at night - I'm up, I'm here, are you ok? No, I'm not. I am really not ok and I need you so I call............God answers the phone in the form of a friend.


God is in the arms that circle round the child, holding them, holding them close. These arms and these tears and this heart of a mom are God telling this child that they are loved, that this is real and that he is safe for today. In the midst of utter sadness, there isn't joy for the moment, there isn't happiness in that moment but there is love.


God is in the voices of the children - how amazing to hear God speak! At the end of a long day that promised to get even longer, I was weary and a bit angry because of the load I was carrying. I wanted to be done and couldn't see past the endless to do list. Then I hear God's voice.........."Time for pile on daddy prayers.......God is........." and then a chorus of praise sounds from the lips of my children "God is ALL POWERFUL, ALL LOVING, ALL HEART, ALL GOOD, BRAVE, AWESOME, GOOD, GREAT, EVERYWHERE" I rush to write down the words they spoke so that I don't forget who He is and who I am in Him.


I feel I have grown up a bit in the last few months. I have seen the suckiness of life up close and personal. I have seen what it looks like to have life ravage you and leave you short of breath and wondering how to get to the next day. But through this growing up I have seen what God looks like.

God has arms that encircle you and promise a love that never ends, even speaking Italian at times.

God has a wide open mouth, a face that turns beet red and laughter that is contagious, unstoppable in the face of tragedy.

God has red hair and is loud and funny and always there.

God has a loving spirit that guides you through haunted houses, liturgical dancing and growing as a family.

God has a southern accent. God drives vegetable oil fueled cars. God has glasses and drives a mini van that will pick up my children anytime, anywhere. God has bright pink lipstick and a laugh that can be heard round the world. God has a beard. God has a sweet spirit and can make mashed potatoes drenched in bacon gravy so good that you will swear you must have already died and gone to heaven itself.


And that is what I have learned in these past few months. Just when life is at it's suckiest, when things seem so dark and awful and hopeless, that is when God is most present. That is when all around His hands, His heart, His laughter, His love, His realness is most evident. I have seen Him at work. I have seen who God is through so many around me. It has been amazing.

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